I got a sticker!!
The other day I was dropping M off at Preschool (She calls it Pretty school! LOL!) and we were doing our usually good bye ritual. She has always separated easily, and the last thing we do before I leave is give a Hug and a kiss. She has one for me and one for "Her Bwuddah".
Well, one boy that was separated from his peers due to behavior issues made a face at M, Stuck out his tongue and was basically being very much a boy. This caused M to pause during our Ritual and exclaim "Mom, C is sticking his tongue out at me>" "Mom, he's making faces" and so on, I got in M's face and looked her straight in the eye. I told her that she has no control over the ways others will treat her, but she can control how to react to them. C was trying to get her attention, and make her mad, and while that is not right, she had the power to just ignore him and walk away. I told M that she is a very smart girl and that she shouldn't let others control how she feels. I was rewarded with a very big hug and a excited Kiss as she skipped away to play in the house center.
M's teacher was standing there as I stood up. Now I really have respect for Miss V, but haven't exactly embraced her tough love style of teaching. I do like that she is direct with the parents and not harsh with the kids, but I was somewhat put off with her strictness, even when the parent is there. I got that same feeling in the pit opf my stomach that I used to get when someone in authority stare me down because they think I did something wrong and want an explaining, but I have no idea what I did wrong in their eyes! Miss V, gave me a huge hug and said, "Now, that was some great character skills, Mom! You get a sticker for that!" I gave her a hug back and flashed her a smile and walked out of the room. She yelled back "where do you think you are going? You didn't get your sticker, yet!" Now I was feeling a bit foolish, like when your Aunt makes a huge fuss over your how great your c+ was when you KNOW you are capable of A's! But part of me was very proud! Me! I earned a sticker for being a mom! It was a cheap sticker, but it had 3 starts and the word WOW on it. I found it on the boy's sock twice and tried to replace it each time, knowing it was very much less sticky than it was the first time it was placed there. It was missing from my jacket by the end of the day, but in my mind it will be there whenever I get those doubting thoughts wondering if I am being a good mom.
Now, I'm not sure Miss V, ever knew that I didn't get warm fuzzies around her, but I do now! I know that she has the same values that I do, and will recognize a job well done, and steer my girl in the right direction if she makes a bad choice. I know that she has a tough job. And I think I will give her a no reason gift, anonymously, of course!
My head is up just a bit higher because she took a moment to tell me, "You did good, Mom!!" She did it in front of my child, and her peers, as well as the teacher's assistance and I think the snack lady was even there. And as I strolled out of the building, I showed my sticker to the director and bragged that Miss V gave it to me! I doubt anyone will know that she gave me so much more, too!!
Well, one boy that was separated from his peers due to behavior issues made a face at M, Stuck out his tongue and was basically being very much a boy. This caused M to pause during our Ritual and exclaim "Mom, C is sticking his tongue out at me>" "Mom, he's making faces" and so on, I got in M's face and looked her straight in the eye. I told her that she has no control over the ways others will treat her, but she can control how to react to them. C was trying to get her attention, and make her mad, and while that is not right, she had the power to just ignore him and walk away. I told M that she is a very smart girl and that she shouldn't let others control how she feels. I was rewarded with a very big hug and a excited Kiss as she skipped away to play in the house center.
M's teacher was standing there as I stood up. Now I really have respect for Miss V, but haven't exactly embraced her tough love style of teaching. I do like that she is direct with the parents and not harsh with the kids, but I was somewhat put off with her strictness, even when the parent is there. I got that same feeling in the pit opf my stomach that I used to get when someone in authority stare me down because they think I did something wrong and want an explaining, but I have no idea what I did wrong in their eyes! Miss V, gave me a huge hug and said, "Now, that was some great character skills, Mom! You get a sticker for that!" I gave her a hug back and flashed her a smile and walked out of the room. She yelled back "where do you think you are going? You didn't get your sticker, yet!" Now I was feeling a bit foolish, like when your Aunt makes a huge fuss over your how great your c+ was when you KNOW you are capable of A's! But part of me was very proud! Me! I earned a sticker for being a mom! It was a cheap sticker, but it had 3 starts and the word WOW on it. I found it on the boy's sock twice and tried to replace it each time, knowing it was very much less sticky than it was the first time it was placed there. It was missing from my jacket by the end of the day, but in my mind it will be there whenever I get those doubting thoughts wondering if I am being a good mom.
Now, I'm not sure Miss V, ever knew that I didn't get warm fuzzies around her, but I do now! I know that she has the same values that I do, and will recognize a job well done, and steer my girl in the right direction if she makes a bad choice. I know that she has a tough job. And I think I will give her a no reason gift, anonymously, of course!
My head is up just a bit higher because she took a moment to tell me, "You did good, Mom!!" She did it in front of my child, and her peers, as well as the teacher's assistance and I think the snack lady was even there. And as I strolled out of the building, I showed my sticker to the director and bragged that Miss V gave it to me! I doubt anyone will know that she gave me so much more, too!!
posted by Elena at 10:59 PM
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